Blog Posts

Blogger & YouTube advice: People hate so don’t be afraid to delete and moderate your comments

UPDATED***

My first video on my new music channel “GWIYOMI” :D!!

Found this quote that was perfect for this post…..

“People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Love them anyway.If you do good, people may accuse you of selfish motives. Do good anyway.


If you are successful, you may win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.


Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.


People who really want help may attack you if you help them. Help them anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you may get hurt. Give the world your best anyway.


– Mother Teresa”

I’m honestly pretty sick of all the insults and hate comments I get on my YouTube (but you readers are absolutely delightful)


So it’s time to get serious.
I’m a huge advocate of open communication. Commenting on other people’s blogs and videos is a great way to share your thoughts. But I still think there is a need for us not to take this too far.
After being on YouTube, it’s like opening the floodgates to anyone and anyone to have their say. While thats a great thing, some people are just plain mean and unreasonable. They think that by hiding in behind a anonymous username gives them an excuse to act like sub-par human beings.
I’m pretty sure that these people will never say the same thing to someones face in real life, at least I hope so?
The amount of judging and hate that goes on online is increasing, and it’s really not healthy. And anyone that puts themselves out there online to help people run into a risk of getting a lot of “haters” or “trolls” or just very nosy people.
And to these “people”
Just like I wouldn’t go up to a stranger on the street and tell them intimate details of my life, I also don’t owe you, you random commenter, an explanation?
Be open and honest but you don’t have to tell everyone everything, this is your decision and don’t feel bad about being confident about it. 
Sometimes if you tell too much it can actually put you in physical danger, there are lots of stalkers and crazy people lurking online so be careful girls. People can track back to everything you’ve ever said online, it doesn’t have to be all at once so be careful where you take pictures etc. I don’t want any of you guys to get hurt 🙁
And I also don’t appreciate you judging me before you even get to know me. I’m pretty sure that you wouldn’t want people to jump to conclusion about you as well. 
I remember the first time I got a comment on my channel I was so depressed…..I almost was like about to throw it all away and give up cause some people are just too hurtful. 
I don’t think it’s the crazy comments that hurt, because they are just funny, but the slightly judgey ones that is a bit manipulative. 

The subtle ones.
I put in so much of MY OWN time and NOT GETTING PAID FOR IT to share what I learnt so that it may help you, entertain you, and I only want the best for you!!

and Don’t forget… I ALSO HAVE FEELINGS TOO!! Just cos I’m behind a computer screen doesn’t mean I’m not a real girl that has feelings and insecurities too!!
So all you bloggers and YouTubers, don’t be afraid to delete these comments even if these people came back to you in full force and demand why you deleted their comment (yes it happens). 
These people are more likely to be unreasonable and demand things from you that they don’t have a right to, and if you’re a nice person by nature you may feel bad about it – but really don’t.
I used to feel bad about deleting comments because I felt that my viewers should have their say, but if they cross the line then why not? This epiphiny happened after looking at the bigger picture.
If you are seriously thinking of taking your blogging or YouTube channel to a more serious level these are the things you need to consider when deciding to delete a comment or not.

Will this hurt your ability to work with people in the future?

I’m actually a marketer by day, so I deal with a lot of different brands and know what they are looking for when they decide to work with a blogger or a YouTuber. One of these considerations is how “clean” your image is online. 
Just like brands don’t want to be endorsed by a drug addict, they also don’t want their brand to be tainted by swearing, anger, and overall negative or controversial topics and this comes down to what you want to show on your blog or channel. 
Keep that in mind and delete anything negative and any profanity and violence. Also feel free to remove comments about things you don’t support, otherwise you can be easily associated with it.

Can I have this conversation offline?

Sometimes a commenter may have the best of intentions but may come out wrong, this can happen all the time and the best way to deal with this is to move conversations into a private forum. Delete the comment and take it the conversation to place where you feel comfortable.
If someone is asking something personal, and you want to answer them, but don’t need the whole world to know – just find a way to message them privately. Explain why you have taken the conversation offline and give them the answer. 
I usually extend this courtesy to people I feel were not intentionally trying to embarrass you or take a stab at you.

Do I need to block this person?

Sometimes after all the effort you going to talking reason with someone, it just wont get through, this is when you should think about blocking them from your channel or website. This is drastic but will save you a lot of heartache in the future.
At the end of the day your blog and your channel is like your house. Would you let someone come into your home and yell and swear at you, and say bad things? 
No. 
Would you kick them out? 
Yes.
You have a right to treat your online “home” in the same way. If you don’t have time to check back often you can turn on “approval needed”, because one malicious comment can actually do more harm to you then you think, not only for your own self-esteem and confidence but also in the confidence potential sponsors may have.

UPDATE ON 2/5/2013

Tonight has always been a tough night for me, and some of your close to me will know why. I don’t know if some people like to publically shame people for the sake of it without sorting it out first or if they are trying to get attention. Either way, its not getting any public attention from my end.

I will never ever talk bad about someone publicly, even if you make me so angry it is so damn tempting to, it makes you look worse then the person you are trying to criticise and it just means you are just as bad at them – SO DON”T DO IT GUYS!! Just talk to someone supportive and ignore whats going on, no matter how much they try and work you up.

It’ll blow over, so stay focused on what you are trying to doand who you are trying to help/share with.

If you guys ever feel bullied or been on the wrong end of the stick in any way, please talk to me! You can message me on Kik (wengie) or privately through my Facebook page. Seriously encourage you to talk about it (it makes you feel better) and not super bitter and angry. And don’t do the mean thing and humiliate the person bullying you, talk to me first please 🙂

And I totally understand the temptation. It just feels powerless when someone does that and then shuts you off and wont reason. You feel like you should defend yourself, but if people wanna draw bad conclusions from you from a person that is acting so unpolitely, unreasonably and negatively, they are probably going to find an excuse for something down the line anyways. We aren’t perfect so there will be always something for them to pick on.

Negative people love to join each other and complain and find excuses to talk bad about people.

SO TALK TO ME AND DONT JOIN IN. Thank you to TAMMY(can’t wait to come to Singapore and hang out with you again) and my other friends who are just so kind to me that it pulled me out of this depressing mood.

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41 Comments

  • Reply
    Nanakko Chan
    May 1, 2013 at 4:43 am

    That's so true. That's my biggest fear is people say bad things about my weight. I'm going through big changes in losing weight to be healthy and look good. I mean I have to care about my looks and I have insecurities but a couple of girls on my personal facebook decided to take a good stab at me randomly and try to say they accidently deleted me. I don't see how that would happen though lol. People are really direct with me lately and some of it is constructive but just plainly judgemental when I'm a really cool, creative, sweet girl. I do have my moments but I swear no matter what we do, say, or look like people will try to bring us down and judge us so I just well like you said "delete their comments, or block them" Sometimes my biggest fear is opening my youtube video and seeing the nasty comments. I can't ignore them because I fear others will read that and make assumptions and it looks negative to sponsors. For sure I learned the hard way with my hot temper. lol. We all make mistakes right? XD

    • Reply
      admin
      May 1, 2013 at 6:49 am

      Aww so true right? You have a beautiful soul so thats not cool 🙁 And it's brave of your to be so open online as well so it sucks when people don't see that as a positive experience.

      It's better to ignore them and delete them then lash out I agree, don't waste your precious time on people that choose to be so mean 🙂

  • Reply
    Anonymous
    May 1, 2013 at 6:47 am

    Wengie you are a really big inspiration

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:53 pm

      Thank you random nice person <3

  • Reply
    Nurfaezah Abdullah
    May 1, 2013 at 7:02 am

    waaaa i enjoy reading your blog wengie 🙂

    blogger from Brunei ^^

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:53 pm

      Thank you :)!!! <3

  • Reply
    ♥ Natalie
    May 1, 2013 at 8:36 am

    Hi Wengie! (:
    Thanks so much for followeing me, I came accross your blog a few times to read your posts and I like them! Why didn't I follow? Ö__Ö I think I simply forgot ^__^''
    I agree with your opinion, I don't know why people spread so much hate on other channels. It's the same on blogs…

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:52 pm

      Makes me want to sing "where is the love" jahhaa <3

  • Reply
    renturquise
    May 1, 2013 at 9:24 am

    awh wengie 🙁
    i know what you feel and i totally agree with u
    people just don't get right on their position and keep talking about another like they are the perfect one, oppss no offense for the haters 😀

    just be yourself and positive thinking 🙂
    xxx
    aboutbeautyandcosmetics.blogspot.com

  • Reply
    angel snowflower
    May 1, 2013 at 9:25 am

    Yeah, there will always be haters when you are in public view. Look ahead and ignore their remarks!

    angel
    http://thesnowflowerrr.blogspot.com/

  • Reply
    LaPetiteMichelle©
    May 1, 2013 at 9:52 am

    Awesome advices 🙂 it's true there's alot of people especially nowadays that are being bullies online. like when i first started making my own videos on youtube i did received some awful comment's that's why i stopped for like a year. I'm not really an open person, i'm stupidly shy in person. People like you inspired me to open up and share my knowledge and now i'm back, more stronger that before i guess hehee. well anyway's thank you for these advice's they're very sincere and true. keep it up wengie (。◕‿◕。)~♥

    Michelle.

    http://www.lapetitemichelle.blogspot.com/

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:51 pm

      Aww thats really sad the haters made you stop your channel :(!!! Feel free to talk to me if you ever feel like that again ^^!! No one bullies my readers :(!!!

      I'm also not a very open person too, and shy sometimes 🙁 …….

      Thank you so much for your lovely comment :)!!

    • Reply
      LaPetiteMichelle©
      May 4, 2013 at 2:10 pm

      aww you're so sweet wengie <3
      Thank you for taking your time to reply our comments that's very nice of you ^__^
      anyway, sure i would love to share and listen to your advices but i don't wanna hurdle you up with my personal drama's >__< it's just soo embarrassing to you hehee.
      anyway, but i'll keep that in mind, thank you! and oh have a nice day and hope you gain more success you're just super duper kind!

      -Mitch

      http://lapetitemichelle.blogspot.com/

  • Reply
    INSPIRING__♥__THING
    May 1, 2013 at 10:41 am

    Your advices always inspire me a lot and I enjoy it everytime I read a post from you. >.< You sound really sincere in every post. 🙂
    Yeah, I totally agree with you here. There will be always haters out there and judge you for everything you make and say but that is society nowadays. It´s really sad. ._. Some of them has nothing better to say than hateful things. They are jealous of you. xD
    Sometimes I wanted to stop running my blog because of these comments but I think to myself, that there are also much people out there who enjoy my blog and like what I post about. I want to give those people something and they let me forget about "haters" for awhile.
    Wengie, you have a lot of readers and supporters (I´m the one of them xD) so keep up the good work! ♥

    Much love,
    InspiringThing

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:47 pm

      Thank you ><!! I hope you keep posting too :)!! Yea it's really sad what some people think is ok to do, and i heard many bad stories some girls even commit suicide from being bullied online – now thats just not cool…

      I hope if more of us carry this attitude of zero tolerance to those kinda people slowly it may get better, but it wont happen overnight 🙁

      <3

  • Reply
    THE HF BLOG
    May 1, 2013 at 11:23 am

    great post hon 🙂
    **************
    HF
    http://the-hf-blog.blogspot.pt/

  • Reply
    H A N N A H . M A Y . R O S E . †
    May 1, 2013 at 12:06 pm

    This is such a great post! I've never had a youtube channel but I've had a lot of awful haters on my blog in the past. Wish I'd read something like this back then 🙂

    HANNAH †
    [londonroseblog.com]

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:45 pm

      :(! I hope Karma comes back at them really! I think if we all keep supporting each other it will be ok :D!! Thank you for your kind words!

  • Reply
    Rachael
    May 1, 2013 at 1:33 pm

    Really Like what you said 🙂

    Wayycher

    wayycher.blogspot.com

  • Reply
    caise
    May 1, 2013 at 1:45 pm

    oh I am sorry you've gotten mean comments:(

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:56 pm

      It's ok, I usually calm down soon enough :)! I just get sad when other people have to go through similar things too 🙁

  • Reply
    Wall Of StYle
    May 1, 2013 at 2:10 pm

    I totally agree with you!Sometimes people are too mean…without a particular reason! And just because they are behind a screen 'cause in real life they'll never be able to say a word!Try not to give them importance and be always proud of your job! They talk 'cause they have a mouth but no brain!
    =)
    With Love
    Ylenia

    http://www.wallofstyleblog.blogspot.it

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:56 pm

      Yah so true not to give them importance :)! Thanks for stopping by <3

  • Reply
    Parisian Fairytale
    May 1, 2013 at 2:17 pm

    thank you for this post and video, its really useful !
    xoxo
    parisian-fairytale.blogspot.fr

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:56 pm

      Thank you for taking your time to read it 🙂

  • Reply
    livlovelaugh
    May 1, 2013 at 2:30 pm

    I enjoyed your gwiyomi video. Also, your normal voice is so much nicer than what i expected — i'm so glad you don't talk in a fake baby voice. Are you Korean btw?

    -liv
    http://chocolivlovelaugh.blogspot.kr/

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:43 pm

      Thank you liv 🙂 I only use my super gross baby voice on my bf hahahaha =.=..poor thing right??

      I'm Australian Chinese 🙂 I just love Korean stuff tho!!

  • Reply
    Ira Kharchenko
    May 1, 2013 at 5:07 pm

    Amazing post! I love it:)

    http://theprintedsea.blogspot.de/

  • Reply
    Lina Dinh
    May 1, 2013 at 8:26 pm

    I agree with everything that you said. I recently had this happen to me and my very kind readers jumped right in and put that "anonymous" idiot in their spot. I won't ever let these idiots put me down and ruin my day. Be the bigger and better person and don't ever let these bullies control your emotions. I've been through all that bullying throughout my life and I'm happy I didn't give up after all of that. You are a great blogger girl. I wish I stumbled across your blog during the time I was in Aussie =)

    xoxo, Lina

    http://www.linadinh.com

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:41 pm

      Thanks Lina :)!! It's great to have support from friends right :)!! The most frustrating moment I just experienced is when they do it on their own blog, and these delete your comments and also moderate it so they only show the negative ones. Anyone coming to jump to ur support wont be shown – stupid right??

      >: (…some people make me so mad – but what can u do, if you publically shame them then u are just as bad… :/…

  • Reply
    sgrmse.
    May 2, 2013 at 1:12 am

    How do you maintain your blonde hair? I'm probably guessing that there are quite a number of products readily available for bleached hair in Australia. A shame this isn't the case here. I've recently had to trade in my blonde hair for brunette again )):

    Also, how often do you touch your roots up? (or do you just cheat and Photoshop?)

    Personally, I feel that if you have a space for people to comment, it shouldn't be biased to only displaying "the good stuff." Then again, that's just my opinion. Each to their own.

    • Reply
      admin
      May 2, 2013 at 2:38 pm

      I buy bleach mix at Priceline which is like a beauty/drugstore :)!!

      I wish I can learn to photoshop videos and stuff but I do my roots every 3 weeks – sometimes its bad.

      I'm not referring to "bad" things like I keep comments like" you hair is greasy" "your hair is orange" thats stuff fine, but when it becomes personal like "you're an ugly bitch" thats when I draw the line. If you can't say it to someone on the street don't say it to me. There is constructive and there is malicious.

      There have been many cases of teenagers comitting suicide due to this kind of behaviour – so thats when I really draw the line.

  • Reply
    admin
    May 2, 2013 at 8:48 am

    Oh wow, I honestly didn't even know this existed, and I had a look at those comments those aren't even from my own account and this girl hasn't approached me about it either it kinda feels pretty hurtful >.<…

    I've messaged her privately about the matter too now thanks for bringing it up.

    I'd advise if you receive any comments from accounts that are not my blogger account probably best to delete them ><….

  • Reply
    admin
    May 2, 2013 at 9:05 am

    Btw want to thank you for bringing this to my attention :)!! <3 Don't know how to thank you but yea it's people like you that keep me going ><!! *super hug*

  • Reply
    DancingBlood
    May 2, 2013 at 10:19 am

    Well Done Wengie! Absolutely inspirational and honest. Never let someone's opinion (or fear of it) determine what you should or should not do. Staying true to your belief is creating the biggest statement of it all…THIS IS ME, LIVE WITH IT!

    Your fashion/lifestyle blog is suddenly looking more and more interesting to us guys!

  • Reply
    Isa Machado
    May 2, 2013 at 12:52 pm

    Hello girl! Thank you for your comment! I am following you on GFc and Bloglovin, hope you follow back! *

  • Reply
    Style by Three
    May 2, 2013 at 2:31 pm

    Loved your post! I also hate it when people hide behing usernames and think its ok to say bad things about everything!

    Style by Three Blog
    Facebook

  • Reply
    Ginger Bread
    May 2, 2013 at 3:16 pm

    the world is black, white and plain old grey. When there's good people, there's also the bad. I guess in life we have to learn how to deal with the negative aspects, and also enjoy the good moments that come by everyday. Your post says it all, and everyone can relate to it 🙂 Really good advice there, your post. Love it! ^^

  • Reply
    Ginger Bread
    May 2, 2013 at 3:21 pm

    oh yeah! i dunno if u've seen my reply to your comments on my blog, but I'll say it again anyway! thanks loads for reading my blog :))) Really appreciate it! Your comments really made my day ^^

  • Reply
    Jenn
    May 3, 2013 at 3:25 am

    This is a really wonderful post; very insightful and very inspiring. There will always be people who will want to bring you down. Either they are too jealous that you are actually having fun with your life and they aren't or they are just plain cruel and full of insecurities. Shrug them off and stay positive. It's good that you have a lot of good people to surround yourself with to stay positive. Don't think about the bad and focus only on the good. There are still a lot of people who want to read your blog and want new videos from you. 🙂

    You have a very pretty face and I really love your blog. I am your newest follower. I hope you can check my blog out again, too.

    Jenn
    The Pink Lemonade Girl

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