|My first video on my new music channel “GWIYOMI” :D!!
Found this quote that was perfect for this post…..
“People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Love them anyway.If you do good, people may accuse you of selfish motives. Do good anyway.
If you are successful, you may win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.
People who really want help may attack you if you help them. Help them anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you may get hurt. Give the world your best anyway.
– Mother Teresa”
I’m honestly pretty sick of all the insults and hate comments I get on my YouTube (but you readers are absolutely delightful)
So it’s time to get serious.
I’m a huge advocate of open communication. Commenting on other people’s blogs and videos is a great way to share your thoughts. But I still think there is a need for us not to take this too far.
After being on YouTube, it’s like opening the floodgates to anyone and anyone to have their say. While thats a great thing, some people are just plain mean and unreasonable. They think that by hiding in behind a anonymous username gives them an excuse to act like sub-par human beings.
I’m pretty sure that these people will never say the same thing to someones face in real life, at least I hope so?
The amount of judging and hate that goes on online is increasing, and it’s really not healthy. And anyone that puts themselves out there online to help people run into a risk of getting a lot of “haters” or “trolls” or just very nosy people.
And to these “people”
Just like I wouldn’t go up to a stranger on the street and tell them intimate details of my life, I also don’t owe you, you random commenter, an explanation?
Be open and honest but you don’t have to tell everyone everything, this is your decision and don’t feel bad about being confident about it.
Sometimes if you tell too much it can actually put you in physical danger, there are lots of stalkers and crazy people lurking online so be careful girls. People can track back to everything you’ve ever said online, it doesn’t have to be all at once so be careful where you take pictures etc. I don’t want any of you guys to get hurt 🙁
And I also don’t appreciate you judging me before you even get to know me. I’m pretty sure that you wouldn’t want people to jump to conclusion about you as well.
I remember the first time I got a comment on my channel I was so depressed…..I almost was like about to throw it all away and give up cause some people are just too hurtful.
I don’t think it’s the crazy comments that hurt, because they are just funny, but the slightly judgey ones that is a bit manipulative.
The subtle ones.
I put in so much of MY OWN time and NOT GETTING PAID FOR IT to share what I learnt so that it may help you, entertain you, and I only want the best for you!!
and Don’t forget… I ALSO HAVE FEELINGS TOO!! Just cos I’m behind a computer screen doesn’t mean I’m not a real girl that has feelings and insecurities too!!
So all you bloggers and YouTubers, don’t be afraid to delete these comments even if these people came back to you in full force and demand why you deleted their comment (yes it happens).
These people are more likely to be unreasonable and demand things from you that they don’t have a right to, and if you’re a nice person by nature you may feel bad about it – but really don’t.
I used to feel bad about deleting comments because I felt that my viewers should have their say, but if they cross the line then why not? This epiphiny happened after looking at the bigger picture.
If you are seriously thinking of taking your blogging or YouTube channel to a more serious level these are the things you need to consider when deciding to delete a comment or not.
Will this hurt your ability to work with people in the future?
I’m actually a marketer by day, so I deal with a lot of different brands and know what they are looking for when they decide to work with a blogger or a YouTuber. One of these considerations is how “clean” your image is online.
Just like brands don’t want to be endorsed by a drug addict, they also don’t want their brand to be tainted by swearing, anger, and overall negative or controversial topics and this comes down to what you want to show on your blog or channel.
Keep that in mind and delete anything negative and any profanity and violence. Also feel free to remove comments about things you don’t support, otherwise you can be easily associated with it.
Can I have this conversation offline?
Sometimes a commenter may have the best of intentions but may come out wrong, this can happen all the time and the best way to deal with this is to move conversations into a private forum. Delete the comment and take it the conversation to place where you feel comfortable.
If someone is asking something personal, and you want to answer them, but don’t need the whole world to know – just find a way to message them privately. Explain why you have taken the conversation offline and give them the answer.
I usually extend this courtesy to people I feel were not intentionally trying to embarrass you or take a stab at you.
Do I need to block this person?
Sometimes after all the effort you going to talking reason with someone, it just wont get through, this is when you should think about blocking them from your channel or website. This is drastic but will save you a lot of heartache in the future.
At the end of the day your blog and your channel is like your house. Would you let someone come into your home and yell and swear at you, and say bad things?
Would you kick them out?
You have a right to treat your online “home” in the same way. If you don’t have time to check back often you can turn on “approval needed”, because one malicious comment can actually do more harm to you then you think, not only for your own self-esteem and confidence but also in the confidence potential sponsors may have.
UPDATE ON 2/5/2013
Tonight has always been a tough night for me, and some of your close to me will know why. I don’t know if some people like to publically shame people for the sake of it without sorting it out first or if they are trying to get attention. Either way, its not getting any public attention from my end.
I will never ever talk bad about someone publicly, even if you make me so angry it is so damn tempting to, it makes you look worse then the person you are trying to criticise and it just means you are just as bad at them – SO DON”T DO IT GUYS!! Just talk to someone supportive and ignore whats going on, no matter how much they try and work you up.
It’ll blow over, so stay focused on what you are trying to doand who you are trying to help/share with.
If you guys ever feel bullied or been on the wrong end of the stick in any way, please talk to me! You can message me on Kik (wengie) or privately through my Facebook page. Seriously encourage you to talk about it (it makes you feel better) and not super bitter and angry. And don’t do the mean thing and humiliate the person bullying you, talk to me first please 🙂
And I totally understand the temptation. It just feels powerless when someone does that and then shuts you off and wont reason. You feel like you should defend yourself, but if people wanna draw bad conclusions from you from a person that is acting so unpolitely, unreasonably and negatively, they are probably going to find an excuse for something down the line anyways. We aren’t perfect so there will be always something for them to pick on.
Negative people love to join each other and complain and find excuses to talk bad about people.
SO TALK TO ME AND DONT JOIN IN. Thank you to TAMMY(can’t wait to come to Singapore and hang out with you again) and my other friends who are just so kind to me that it pulled me out of this depressing mood.